Balancing devastation with gratitude

By Theresa Whalen

In late 2021 and nearing my 50th birthday, I experienced a stroke.

My partner recognised the F.A.S.T. signs and called 000, despite my mumbled arguments.

In hospital, I was assessed and treated. On day three, I experienced a second more damaging stroke. As I was in hospital this stroke was treated very quickly. I temporarily lost movement and speech, which I regained in one day.

The stroke left me with a loss of cognitive abilities, smell, and taste, hunger, satiety (decreased hunger and thirst), some short and long- term memory loss. I also experience a mood and personality disorder.

Sadly, I no longer recognise or enjoy any voices or music, but I can still run, cycle, go to the gym and golf! I can enjoy time with my partner and socialise with family and friends. I am still working in Public Heath (cancer research), which is high priority for me. However, due to the cognitive limitations, it’s at a much lower level.

One of my treating physicians recommended that I cope with these changes by balancing devastation with gratitude.

This has been very beneficial to my recovery and on-going management. The advice resonated immediately, especially as I did recover so well physically.

As a long - time runner and golfer, this was especially important. When I am devastated with loss of taste, smell, and hunger, I balance this with the gratitude that food is required to continue with my exercise.

When I am devastated by loss of short- and long-term memories, I balance this with the gratitude that my partner and family and friends are very patient with me and are able to provide much of the information I have lost.

When I am devastated by the decrease in my role at work, I balance this with the gratitude that I am still contributing.

This advice is easy to remember and put into action. But frequently it’s still challenging.

I still have on-going psychological support and read and practice what is provided to me. The devastating effects will last a lifetime, but I try to manage it the best I can.